Forever in our Hearts.

     Wednesday was full of realizations for me. The realization that 5:30am would no longer be when my alarm goes off. The realization that after Thursday I would no longer hear the teachers singing as we entered in for our morning staff meeting. The realization that as I stand outside during passing time, that I know almost every class and at least one learner (if not most or all) of the names in the upper primary classes. The realization that I was going to get very "Namibian Homesick".

     All of my classes were wonderful on Wednesday, as they continued to work on letters for my learners back home or draw self portraits. My math class and I reviewed what we have learned so far this year with a little math basketball, and it was a great day. The tears already began to flow on Wednesday, as yet they came to the realization that tomorrow really was my last day with them. I received several cards and a couple gifts and sweets from the learners as I was leeched to any and every time I left a classroom.

     Wednesday night, we were all busy writing letters, making posters, and creating our last day gifts for our learners and colleagues. That being said, the mood was definitely a little debbie downer like. Until our phone rang...and Uanee was here! Uanee was our guide up north, and he stopped by for a visit. He traveled over 70 km to come see us one last time before we left. It definitely lifted all of our spirits and we loved chatting and catching up with him.

     And then there was Thursday.....our last day at A.I. Steenkamp and stopping by to see the Dolam's children home kids. Being overwhelmed before we even arrived, thanks to the great song of "We are the world, we are the children" that just so happened to be playing on the radio, Kari gave some words of encouragement.

     As we headed into our morning staff meeting, I quickly realized that I was going to start crying immediately. I was in charge of giving the morning devotions, and although I came prepared, my emotions definitely got the better of me the moment they began to sing. I quickly I had to leave for a moment, somewhat compose myself, then enter back in. As I began to talk, the tears started flowing again. I apologized and told them they were going to have to decypher my words between sobs (they all chuckled). After sharing with them 1 Timothy 4:10-13 and sharing what was on my heart, I quickly prayed and jetted back against the wall. I then noticed I was not the only one with tears in the room. Not only had my peers cried, but many of the staff were crying as well. Mrs. Kamahenne shared a few words of encouragement for the day, and thanked us for loving all the learners so much, and then we were off.

     The rest of the day all blends together. My 5D class made friendship bracelets to remember me from the beads we had used as manipulatives for addition and multiplication. They loved them, and there were many onomatopoeias throughout the room as Ms. Jessica seemed to drop a few every now and then. I had them twice today and the second period had a lot of tears. They were, by far, my class that cried the most, and the ones I had to spend the most time with calming them down after.

     My 6A class was a joy today and they made the most of every moment with me. One of their other teachers were not here today, so I stole them for 2 periods instead of just one. I read to them, they colored their portraits, and finished their letters. It was a great last day with all of them (and of course... a lot of tears).

     7B is a class that I definitely became close with as well. A few of the girls came and helped me in my 5D class as their teacher didn't show up either. Although their teacher taught for half of the period, I snuck them pens and pencils they forgot while she taught so they didn't get in trouble for not having one. I then read them my letter, which of COURSE made me lose it all over again, and gave them my address and email. It took 10 minutes to hug and talk to them all before break. I also had the opportunity to join them for PE with Janelle for 8th period, which was great fun.

     Throughout the day, we were all handed dozens of letters, random presents, sweets and given lots of hugs. As I walked around the campus, I couldn't help but tear up as I saw learners that I had even taught for just a period. Their hugs were huge and their smiles melted my heart each and every time.

     The staff also had a little get together for us in the staff room during break. Mrs. Kamahenne had pulled me aside during my break period to talk to me briefly. First, she wanted to talk to me about my experience and my devotion that morning. It ended up being a much longer talk than I thought, but it was great just telling her about our experience and discussing various teaching strategies. She also asked me if they were to buy us cake for break if we would eat it. I said of course we would, even though it was not needed. She went on to explain that in their culture, they are a poor people, but food is what brings unity to them all. It is what shows and builds relationships. That being said, having them share food with us was a way to not only thank us, but to bring us even closer together. Even though our break celebration ended up going 10 minutes into the next period, it was great chatting and saying goodbye to all of the staff. They presented us with some amazing plates with Namibia on it and laminated letters from them that are signed. We also presented them with the Athletics poster we made, a picture of all of us, tons of supplies and PE equipment. It was great.

     The hardest part of the day was the end, once the bell rang. We all went to the center to say our goodbyes, and it became a mad house. Being swarmed by who know how many kids all wanting to hug you, thank you, and hand you letters is heart warming, but also quite crazy. We all felt pretty overwhelmed, but made the most of the situation. I had to put my camera away after the first few minutes, as it was the only thing some learners were sticking around for. Many of my learners from 5D, 6A and 7B were attached to me (as much as they could be with the crowd) and just wanted to be with me as long as possible.

     As we walked out to our taxi in a swarm, it was hard getting through them all to put our things away and get into the vehicle. Seeing the faces of some of my learners that I got to know so well crying broke my heart. As we all climbed into the vehicle, it was a battle to get the door shut and to get them to back away from the taxi. As I was hanging out the window, and through the tears telling them I love them and want them safe so they need to back away from the taxi, they all just clung to the doors, window and bumper more. Shane honked and pulled away, and the learners ran along side us to the intersection and around the corner. Watching Saddam, Hazel, Tia, Megan, Zaccharius, Aloys, and many, many more of my learners chase after our vehicle and shouting my name was, by far, one of the hardest and most emotional moments I have ever experienced.

     We all tried to gain composure as we went straight to Dolam's childrens home afterwards. On arrival, many of the children were already home. We were already a mess and began to tear up as soon as we got there. After hanging out for a bit, taking some pictures, and just 'being' with them, we started to say our goodbyes. I gave my dear Cynthia a book with a note on the inside cover. She stayed strong for a while, and then as we got up to go we both, along with everyone else, melted. I gave Elsie my email and address as she was too emotional to write hers down and we all said our goodbyes. We gave encouraging words to each and everyone of them, then loaded in the taxi for another emotional drive.

     Its been a long day that went by way too fast. My learners' smiles, laughs and hugs will forever be in my heart, but right now are still weighing so heavily on my mind. I love them all so much, and still cannot believe that today was goodbye. They will be in my thoughts daily, in my prayers nightly and in my heart forever. As I sort through the huge stack of letters from them all and the tears begin to flow once more, I hold tight to the quote Janelle said to us this morning: "Don't cry because its over, smile because it happened". I feel so blessed to have met my learners, my colleagues and the children at Dolam's. They have taught me so much about myself and I will never forget them.

Uanee's visit!

My dearest Meme

My First teacher--Mr. !Gaoseb

grade 7 English--Mrs. Terrera

Mrs. Mobuku

grade 5 Math-Mrs. Nafuka

Staff Break Celebration

Mrs. Kamahenne and the Steenkamp Crew

Athletics Poster and Picture

Janelle showing off the PE equipment

Jessica cutting the cake, per tradition

5D Making their Friendship jewelry

Oh my dear, 5D learners...

6A showing off their homework certificates!

They are so proud of their work....

...and I am so proud of them.

Some of my Pre-primary kiddos

Erika

A little break time photo shoot.

My fabulous 6A boys.

Saddam...I love him!

Saying bye to the Pre-Primary learners

I'm going to miss those smiling faces and the huge hugs!

The Special Class out at PE for the 2nd time with me and Janelle

Yeah...I got a little goofy...it was the LAST day :)

Lucia and Brandell....two of my 5D babies

A beautiful flower and letter from one of my 7B lovelies

Game time with Ms. Janelle

7B doing the Seasick turtle

The Mermaid

Oh...how they love Ms. Janelle...

Yeah...i was being mauled.

My 7B sweeties...Love'em, love'em, love'em

Waving goodbye at the Children's home...Love them all: Jessica, Johannes, Gustav, Cynthia, Bianca and Priscilla

Starting a Week of 'Lasts'

     Monday was the last start of a week of school here in Namibia. We all had dreaded going to bed the night before and getting up that morning as we knew it was our last Monday. However, once you get to the school and see all their smiling faces, its nearly impossible not to just focus on the here and now. That being said, I had a great first day to our last week of school.

     It was drizzling rain that morning, so we had our morning assembly inside our homeroom classes instead of as a whole school. Mrs. Kamahene asked us to go over at least one school rule with the groups to start the week off right and then we could do what we wanted for the 40 minute time block. That being said, I took this opportunity to get some nice video footage of my 6A class singing their songs (I love my flip camera!) and then moved on to school rules. We discussed some key rules, such as no fighting. But as the other student teachers here and I have discussed, its not that they don't know the rules, its that they don't know WHY they are important. That being said, we talked about why there is no fighting at Steenkamp and why fighting is bad. It ended up being a great discussion, and when Mrs. Kamahene popped in they loved showing off to her and telling her the importance of not fighting and straight lines.

     I got to keep my fabulous 6A class for the next period, and also had them later that day. That being said, I gave them the opportunity to share thier books with each other for the entire period, rotating pairs. My bubble map learners stayed together and shared with me and the rest of their group their part. It was awesome. They all loved it and they were all excited to get their pictures the next day. Later that day we began our rough drafts to my learners back home. They are awesome...a lot of spelling errors, but they are all so excited to write letters to them.

     The teacher was still gone in 7B, so I read them Wheedle on the Needle. They, too, like every other class, loved the story and the pictures. They did the same 4 square activity for an assignment and they loved that they got to draw in my class. They did awesome and we had a great time. They also are getting quite good at sign language and were all fingerspelling various words to me across the room to check spelling (an advantage I had never thought of, but it was awesome). We did run into one hiccup however...sort of a big one. I had one huge fight break out between one of my female learners and a boy prefect. Out of no where there was a huge bang and it was one of the worst fights I have seen yet. I had to literally pull the prefect off of her, and they were both hurt pretty bad. Come to find out, the reason for the fight: He only wanted to use the color yellow and she thought that was weird. Awesome. A couple letters home, a long chat with me, and apology letters to each other, and the day continued.

     I then filled in for a teacher who had a doctors appointment for 2 periods and ended up getting the one grade 5 class I had never had. However, they were great and so eager to have me read to them, as this was an English class. I just re-used Wheedle on the Needle, then let them ask me questions about my home. The next class was for KKG. Awesome. KKG is the one of the tribe languages that has clicks in it. Instead, I taught them some sign language, we talked about America and they taught me some about their various cultures. Not KKG, but a great period anyways.

     5D...where do I begin? I think I will just discuss both Monday and Tuesday in this one blurb and move on, as looking back on it now I have a different perspective than before. Last week ended up going so great, but they I was gone for Thursday and Friday. When I asked what they did, they literally did nothing. Apparently they were too loud, so the teacher just left them both days to run around the class and do as they pleased. Already, I was not going into a great situation. Monday was rough and we barely got through 3 math problems. Barely. Today was a little better, but it was a double period and they lost it the last 10-15 minutes. Later as I thought about what it was that was wrong, it came to me: I'm being punished for leaving. This revelation came to me thanks to the 43 learners who bombarded me in the center of the schoolyard during break. All of them came up to apologize to me and beg me to still learn them. Many had goodbye letters and several began to cry. Although it is not a justification for their behavior, and I don't think it is the only reason behind it all, there is no way I am holding a grudge and ruining our last week together. So bring on Wednesday.

     After school, Veronica and I went to one of her learner's homes (Kerly's). Kerly is the headgirl at the school. Her house is in the Nama location and her family of 5 lives in a house with a kitchen and one bedroom. Her older brother, sister, and herself sleep on the kitchen floor at night, and they all share one bathroom with the other 3 houses in the same yard. Being that her house was in the Nama location, I also saw Thomas' house, as he was their neighbor, and Hazel's, who was just one house away. It was great to see my learners at home and yet have another hour or two seeing what our learners do after school is out. Tasks such as washing clothes, cooking and homework are tasks that take much more time and a lot more effort that I realized.

     Our last Tuesday brought a lot of letters from our learners, and another full day of teaching. All of my classes went great today and we are all now working on letters for me to take home with me (other than my math class that is). In my free periods, I went with Janelle for some PT. The first class was grade 7 learners, and they refuse to have boys and girls play together. That being said, we had 2 games of soccer going. The next period we had grade 4, and for the first time since Janelle has been here the boys accepted the girls with open arms. I lead a third of the class with jump ropes and frisbees and got the started, while Janelle set up a soccer game with 3 teams that rotated turns playing. It was awesome. We had a blast!
     Today, I also gained two new gifts: pipes. Yes, pipes. One is black and one is white. These lovely objects are used as threatening tools in classrooms by teachers (and, sadly, are also sometimes used). That being said, when I found them next to desks today, I kindly snatched them and took them to a new location: our room garbage can in Casa. Kari has done this in the past, and although stealing is not the example I want to set to my learners, here or back home, I also feel like the pipes are in a better place now.

     After school today I had my last offical afternoon at the orphanage. Elsie was pretty excited that I had learned to count to 10 in KKG (my learners taught me after school today), so we practiced some while the kids rested. I also read Conrad some Harry Potter. Cynthia then lead a few of us in a photo shoot, which was fun until my camera died. Cynthia reminds me a lot of myself as a kid and we have grown pretty close over the course of this trip. About 30 minutes before we left, she asked me to bring her the beads next week so that we could practice math with them again. I told her I would bring them Thursday instead. Then she remembered: it was my last week. She was at my side the rest of the time (not that she wasn't before, though), and I read her some stories. When I went to leave, I had a 9 year old body attached around my neck; head buried in my neck and sobbing. I tried to hold it together and kept telling her I'd see her Thursday, but that didn't last for long.

     I will always cherish the time I have spent with Cynthia and the other children at Dolam's children home. They are each so precious and have so much to offer their community and this world. We all will be going to Dolam's after school Thursday, which is our last day at school, to say goodbye for the last time. Being that I couldn't even hold it together today, I am guessing that Thursday after an emotional day of farewells at Steenkamp, I will be ten times worse. However, the relationships we have all made here are ones that we will remember and cherish forever, and many of them are strong enough to continue a few continents and an ocean away.

7E Learner

6A presenting their Bubble Maps

Victorine (one of the school cleaners). We're buds.

6A cheesing it

6A Having fun

Mr. Aocheub (6A teacher)

little darlings who share Kerly's yard

Kerly's neighbors (Hazel's the farthest away)

Sock washing time

Thomas and his little sister playing next door

Sign language when waiting to enter the classroom

Miss Janelle doing her thing!

A girl and boy soccer game...what a concept.

playing

Cynthia and I...and so the photoshoot begins.

My new 'toys'

Priscilla

Throwing up some "I love you" signs

:)

Getting my hair done as I read.